Guest post by Meghan Miller. She
and her husband have raised SSD London and are currently raising SSD Garnet and
SSD Slider.
How?
It's the number one question I am asked as a puppy raiser for
SSD. How long do you raise them? How much do they pay you? How can I get
involved? And both my most frequently asked and the most heart wrenching: How
can you give them up?
Before our first dog was placed, all I could say was, "I
don't know but it will be worth it." Now that we have said our goodbyes and
our boy has started the life he was meant for, my first thought is “Don’t cry.”
And I usually say, “It’s not easy, but it’s worth it.” The truth of the matter is that it is
extremely hard to give up your dog. You try to tell yourself they never
belonged to you, but after 18 months of training and cuddles and puppy kisses,
they certainly feel like your dog.
The question I am always waiting for, but rarely asked, is
why? Some raisers do this
as a way to teach their child about volunteerism, or because they want to make
a change in someone's life, or because they love dogs, or because they love the
mission of SSD. Our reasons were originally far more selfish: I found myself on an impossible
phone call one day while living in Portland, Oregon. Three thousand miles away,
my best friend had received potentially terrifying news from her doctors.
"They are talking about the big C," she whispered—cancer. We couldn't
even say the word. It was one of those moments where the world came to a
screeching yet silent halt, the kind you find yourself gripping the counter so
you don't go flying off. A moment you know will affect you in a profound way,
but one you have no control over.
I'm the type of person who likes to have control over the every
possible detail, so I found myself bargaining with God, Buddha, the universe,
anyone and everyone who would listen. I was doing dozens of good deeds each
day, from holding doors for the person who's about 30 feet out of appropriate
door holding range, to moving slugs into shadier spots on the side walk, to
giving out money and granola bars to homeless people. I seized every
opportunity, reaping almost instant reward - no one had better luck than me.
But what I was hoping for was some karma to be sent back east to my best
friend.
When my husband and I moved back to PA, we started raising for
SSD, hoping that fundamentally changing the life of a person in need would
provide the necessary cosmic debt to reverse my friend’s ill-boding omens. I was
handed a chubby ball of fluff, a licking machine named SSD London. I could
outline how much and why I love SSD London in great detail, but this story
isn't about falling in love – it’s about finding incredible satisfaction among
equally incredible heartbreak. When I dropped him off at the kennel on the
final night before Team Training, I cried the whole way there and sobbed the
whole way back. I had prepared myself for the pain that would come with being
raiser, even cautioning myself that it would be worse than I imagined. And it
was. So. Much. Worse.
But a funny thing happened
over the next two weeks as I watched my dog fall in love with his new partner.
Just hearing the stories about them absolutely wasn't enough. I still thought,
"It's impossible for someone to love him more than I do." But the moment I saw her, the newest
love of London's life, sleeping on “my” dog, was the moment I truly understood
he was never my dog.
We were lucky enough to share a
meal with London’s forever family and hear all their hopes and concerns about
bringing a new dog into their life, one for which they had been waiting for
over four years. At the end of the night I kissed my boy goodbye and wished
them well, and once again sobbed the whole way home.
Since then we've kept in touch. I have been able to watch London
give his partner a whole new life - new freedoms, new responsibilities, and new
dreams. I have watched
other teams stop seizures, help with walking, and open doors both literally and
figuratively. Every interaction between dog and partner has been worth the
tears I shed when I said goodbye. When I am at my wit’s end or feeling
discouraged, I cling to the knowledge that I have made a real and lasting
positive impact on someone's life.
The night we learned that London would be starting Advanced
Training was also the night I received a text message with a picture of my
friend's clean bill of health. By that time we had started a new journey with a
second dog. My friend was sure to thank us for raising them, citing our dogs as
the reason for her good karma.
And so we give up "our" dogs. We raise them for the friend I
couldn't help and for the family we could. For the mission statement. For the
community of raisers, sitters and huggers. For the opportunity to teach about
giving. For a shorter waiting period for the next partner. For another dog in
the house. For the opportunity to change a life. So in the end, the answer to that
constant “How” question is just another question.
How could I not?
Join Meghan and Susquehanna Service Dogs for the Highmark Walk for a Healthy Community on May 16.
Event Details
When
Saturday,
May 16
On-site
registration starts at 7:45 a.m.
5K Walk
begins at 9 a.m.
One-Mile
Fun Walk begins at 9:15 a.m.
Where
Harrisburg
Area Community College
1 HACC
Drive
Harrisburg,
PA 17110
Registration
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